Trying to get back on course(because I fell off the horse)

you can probably guess why I haven't updated this in so long. And I can't say I'm not ashamed-but its honestly not my fault.

You see, I was in a lot of pain for reasons that I will not disclose to a blank screen, and the medication I was on needed to be taken a ridiculous amount of times a day. Also, I had to eat something when I took it, or else I would throw up anyway and still be in pain. So there. Judge me all you want, but I still have my excuses.

Not quite back where I started. But I swear, you never realize how much weight you've lost until you gain it back.

Its been so weird lately, my stomach has been killing me for the two weeks I ate normal. How dare it forget how to disgust? Gawd, it's never there when I need it.

Things have been bad lately, in other news. Everything's getting out of whack. There are these two people...one is getting old faster than me, and the other is making me loook good. No one is where they belong, and I can feel myself falling into the same old competitions and the ugly little cracks.

This isn't an oh-my-god I have to do something anything freakout, or even a my whole world is crashing and I don't even care anymore breakdown. This is simply a fucked situation, and I am screwed and stressed.

This is one of those times you break every window in your house and scream until you can taste the blood.

I'll stop now before I scare anyone.

lovey-doveys,
eli